Sept. 16, 2007

This was the second worse day of the whole experience. This was the day that Sean's blood platelets dropped very low and the doctors were very concerned. Sean had began to talk and feel a little strong, so we thought he was getting better. He wasnt. We learned that Dengue is tricky. It allows the patient to improve for a few hours, and the fever drops down to nearly normal. Sean got down to about 100-101, and we were so happy. But, the Dengue was only getting worse. Within hours, the fever was sky high again, and the latest blood test showed that Sean was down to 70,000 platelets. A normal person has around 200,000-400,000. The doctors ( 2 of them) sat us down and told us what might happen. They feared that Sean's platelets would continue to drop and he would begin bleeding internally, just like the little boy next to us. They prepped us for a possible blood transfusion and then they would transfer him to ICU and wait and see what happens.
They said to make sure he doesnt blow his nose, pick at his nose, brush his teeth...do anything that might cause bleeding. Because it may not stop...
All this was just too much. I couldnt process what she was telling me, and I began to cry uncontrollably. The doctor told me to settle down, as my crying would stress Sean and cause him to worsen. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, to be strong and pretend that I wasnt worried. But inside, I was scared to death. Sean is my little artist...my helper, my little story teller ( he always likes to tell the stories, instead of hearing them)...I began to worry of life without him. And I just begged the Lord to please, please spare my baby. Please... I have never wanted something so bad in all my life, but for the Lord to just reach down and heal him.
At that moment...I will never forget it. I began to have a peace. It truly was one that "passes all understanding". It was from the Holy Spirit, my sweet Comforter, who in that moment, assured me that it was going to be ok. I felt strong, and just had an incredible peace that I can not even define. Here I was in the worse part of the storm, and I just felt the Lord there and He was literally holding me. It was as if I was breathing Him.